Charlie Sheen was the guest of honor at his own Comedy Central Roast last night.
As far as roasts go it was one of the better ones, after all, who out there can say they wouldn’t want to see Sheen roasted?
Seth MacFarlane kicked things by making reference to the fact that “Two and a Half” men was premiering at the same time and was showing Uncle Charlie’s funeral and wondering out loud how Sheen had managed to stay alive for as long as he had.
Is it us or does Seth MacFarlane look gayer every time we see him?
Jon Lovitz kicked things off saying Charlie was nothing like the part he played in his show on “TMZ” – and that was his funniest joke.
The rest of his shtick was crude and rude and stale. Comedy Central – Leave Jon at home next time.
Kate Walsh was up next and seemed to be in shock that Sheen was still alive. She quipped that after years of abusing his heart, lungs, and body that the only thing he ever had removed was his kids. Ouch.
Next up was comedian Jeff Ross who toured with Charlie last year as part of his “Torpedo of Truth” tour.
Ross seemed to skewer everybody but Sheen and his jabs were tame compared to others. His funniest jab was, “If you are really winning then this must not be a child custody hearing”.
And then there was poor Mike Tyson. Mike is clearly not comfortable in front of a live audience and his set was pretty bad.
All Mike wanted to talk about was poetry and his secret garden.
Comedian Anthony Jeselnik had one of the best sets. It was well thought out and his delivery was great. It was rude and crude but was funny.
His best line was that Charlie only got on TV because God hates Michael J. Fox. He also said every moment of Sheen’s life looks like the first two minutes of Law and Order SVU.
Steve-O was next and started by telling about locking himself in the bathroom with Charlie and doing 5 grams of Cocaine.
Other than that, Steve-O is the creepiest guy in the World and has had his brain and testicles hit one too many times by heavy objects.
Comedian Amy Schumer was next. Man she sucks. I don’t think there was one funny joke there at all but you can be the judge.
Our hero William Shatner was next. If not for Capt. Kirk himself the show would have been a bore.
Shatner called Sheen a “Mexican” and bestowed his vast wisdom on Charlie while calling home Carlos and plugging Priceline.com.
Next was Patrice O'Neal who started off by calling Shatner an A--hole. He then spent his time railing on everybody but Charlie.
But what he said about the other comedians was pretty funny.
Finally the man of the hour stepped up to give his responses to his roasters.
He said until tonight he didn’t realize how f---ed up he really was and all this time he just thought he was having fun.
So there you have it. The best clips of the evening.
We didn’t learn much more about Charlie, but we did learn that most everybody there besides him seems to be gay.
In Hollywood? Who would of thought!
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» Video - Charlie Sheen Gets Burnt Bad at the Comedy Central Roast
Monday, September 19, 2011
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